Why do we face Grief and Sorrows in our Life?

Every human being wants to stay happy always without any fear in his mind. We all want to live in this perfect world where no one would hurt us. Where there would be no sorrow and no grief in our way but that perfect situation can only be wished and can never be experienced. The concept of ultimate happiness can not be found in this world. If poor are worried about their basic needs then rich are worried about their money or something else. A poor person thinks that the rich one is happy where as the rich person seeks for peace of mind. He has everything but still lacks peace that the poor has. People often think that only they are facing problems and the rest of the world is happy. That is not true. Every person in this world faces sorrows and grief. In fact, grief did not spare any one. If a person looks happy that does not mean he has no problems in his life. That shows that he is still keeping a happy face in all of his adversities.

Reasons for Adversities And Hardships

Nothing comes without a reason so as adversities in our life. Allah does not do anything

without purpose. Before we look into the causes of calamities and hardships, we need to make sure whether we have right perception about this life or not. This life is actually a test for the mankind. The purpose of man’s creation is to praise Allah as per our Holy 
book  Quran

“I have created the jinn and humankind only for My worship” (51:56)

Allah has given us choice and a free will and after that He has asked us to remember Him and follow His orders. Then He puts humans into troubles as well as into happy moments and checks the attitude of the person. If one person is happy today, he may not be happy tomorrow. These ups and downs require you to remember Allah and praise him in all circumstances. Seek help from him with prayers and have trust that your Allah will take you out of it. This belief makes you strong enough to ask Allah only for your needs. Put all of your legal efforts to solve the problem and keep on praying. Allah is actually observing that if you loved Allah in good times, did you remember Him in bad ones? This is the attitude that Allah wants you to adopt. As this world is a testing place, so you never find ultimate happiness over here. That is a reason why goods days are followed by bad ones. Every day and every moment, this exam is going on. So we must do what Allah wants us to do rather than what we want because by following the orders of our Allah, we will be successful in this life and the hereafter. If a person forgets Allah and does not worship and remember him till his death, he is failed in the test and will be going to hell where as the pious ones will go to heaven. Heaven is the reward from Allah’s side to His obedient creature. People will always stay happy there, they will have what they want, loads of tasty fruits and eatables and peace of mind. So the ultimate concept of happiness that every man carries does not lie in this world but in the next one as a reward, for remembering Allah in all circumstances.

I read a true story of a girl and she said that she did everything to make herself happy. She crossed every limit to do things the way she wanted to.  Habitual of taking drugs, not being loyal in relationships, she lived her life the way she wanted to but still she was unhappy and committed suicide. Her last words were

“I did everything right or wrong to make myself happy and now I realize that ultimate happiness does not lie in this life. So I don’t want to live it anymore”

That shows that we can not be successful in this world by following our will but by following Allah’s will. He has created us and he knows better what is good and bad for us. If we do not follow his commandments, how can we still stay happy when making a person happy is in his control as well?

In our holy book Quran, two reasons are provided for the occurrence of hardships.

i)                 Due to the person’s sins

One of the reasons for facing problems is actually our own sins that we have committed. We should not live a life with disobedience of Allah and doing things against his will. This way actually, we are moving towards hell with our deeds. Allah does not want us to choose the path that leads to hell so he afflicts the person with some adversity and calamity in order to draw his attention towards his bad acts and make them better by repentance. Problems in a person’s life bring him closer to his lord as he needs His help.

“Whatever misfortune happens to you is because of the things your hands have wrought and for many (of them) He grants forgiveness.”

Quran(42:30)

So, if you are facing unfavorable circumstances in your life, turn to Allah, look at the sins you are committing and ask for His forgiveness.

ii)                Elevation of ranks in front of Allah

Sometimes it happens that some people are pious and they remember Allah, worship him and leading their life according to Allah’s commandments, yet they are facing so many problems and tragedies in their lives. By observing such situation, people often wonder that why is this person facing all these calamities even when he does not forget Allah at all. The reason can be further explained in the below mentioned verse.

“The magnitude of the reward goes along with the magnitude of the affliction. When Allah, who is great and glorious, loves people He afflicts them, and those who receive it gladly receive Allah’s pleasure, but those who are displeased receive Allah’s displeasure” (Hadith:Tirmidhi)

The reason for putting a pious person into adversities is Allah’s giving a chance to a person to prove his obedience and love for His Lord. When a person reacts in a positive way in his problems, he becomes more patient, grateful, courageous and a strong person. Consequently, ranks of the person are elevated near Allah and it is one of the major factors to be successful in the hereafter. And of coarse, this life is a test for all mankind so facing problems and things you dislike are part of the test.

“It might be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings about a great deal of good through it” (Quran 4:19)

The Cure for Grief

Grief and sorrows are a part of every human’s life. The cure for grief is to accept the decisions of Allah, keep an attitude of gratefulness, be patient, repenting on our sins, be sure that we are not alone as Allah is there for us and keep up the trust in Allah. Let’s look into the detail to understand well.

An Attitude Of Gratefulness

No matter what happens, we should be thankful to Allah for what we have rather than 

what we don’t have. Sitting in your room, if you look around at the things you have in it, you should be thankful to Allah as He has given you everything. If you look at your body, you should be grateful for a healthy body, two eyes that help you to see, ears, nose, mouth, arms, legs and for all of the systems working correctly inside your body without your consent. These are all the gifts of Allah. Normally humans realize their importance when they lose any one of them.

“In worldly matter, look at the one who is inferior to you and do not look at the one who is superior to you. In this way, you will not look down upon the bounties that Allah has bestowed upon you” (Hadith: Tirmidhi)

Moreover, there are also a lot of benefits for being grateful which are as follows
#1

·        Allah gives more to grateful people
#   #2

·        Being grateful in this world in all circumstances pleases Allah and leads towards heaven.

·      #3
     Being grateful saves from becoming hopeless and depressed in our bad times.

Patience

Patience is the ability to face a negative situation with positive attitude. Patience is the

key to success in this world and the hereafter.  To achieve success in our lives, we must use the key of patience. For example, to get education we wake up daily in the morning, spend hours in the educational institution, prepare test and give exams. All these things seem difficult for us but patience is the main factor that helps us pass through this journey successfully. In many situations especially relationships, patience work as a binding glue between the husband and the wife. Without showing tolerance to the bad qualities of your spouse, you can not carry it on as no human is perfect.

Apart from the worldly benefits, patience is the favorite attitude of a person that Allah wants him to adopt. Apparently, it seems that we are losing the game with patience but we actually win in the end because Allah helps those who are patient. Allahs says

“O you who believe! Seek help with patience perseverance and prayer: for Allah is with those who patiently presevere” (Quran 2:153)

So if you are worried about some matter, be patient, put in your best without being negative and pray to Allah, he will surely solve your problems.

Repentance

Repenting from the mistakes you made in the past, brings you closer to Allah and lifts up

the burden of sins from your soul. It often happens that the guilt of some sin does not let you sleep or makes you feel depressed. If you truly repent over what you did and do not repeat it, Allah forgives you and you feel quite relaxed.

Belief in the here after

Belief in the hereafter is such a strong factor that reduces the intensity of grief and sorrows. When you are sure about the fact that these painful moments are temporary belonging to this life only and you will be rewarded by Allah for your patience in the hereafter, it relaxes your mind and departs your depression.

Trust in Allah

Our religion teaches us to submit our will to Allah’s will. Once we will do that, our soul will automatically be relaxed. Trust in Allah demands to put all of our positive efforts to solve our problem, pray, do what Allah has asked us to do and leave the rest over him.  If you are facing pain, be patient and pray for the relief. Allah helps for sure. It may take sometime but He does not disappoint those who trust him. Pains and sorrows are from Allah’s side as a test for us in this life whether we still obey Allah or not. So trusting in Allah makes you successful in the exam. And there are also certain things that you dislike but they are good for you as you learn a lot from your bad experiences. Allah says in the Holy book Quran

“It might be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings about a great deal of good through it” (4:19)