Marriage is a relationship in which a man and a woman are tied together to spend their lives together as a team. It is extremely important to understand the word “team” before getting into the relationship. It is lifestyle that has been prescribed by God for humans to live a satisfied life emotionally and physically. But as we see nowadays, marriage is now a good subject for jokes and disliked relationship by singles. Most of the jokes shared interpret wives as the most silly person and husbands as an innocent person loaded with a number of responsibilities of his wife and children. Unmarried people normally take marriage as a big responsibility that will be imposed on them and they’ll be tied together in a relationship sacrificing their independence in return.

Living this life is not a joke whether job seeking is concerned or saving a marriage. Always remember life never offer you success by following short cuts or by sitting idle. One has to work hard with consistency to achieve something good in life and many times it happens that to achieve a fruitful result, you keep on working hard regardless of how hard the circumstances are around you. Same is the case with marriage. To live a happy married life, you’ll have to work hard with full devotion. You should first focus on performing your duties and then asking for your rights. Even if your spouse is not giving you your rights, your good attitude will do the magic with time. Your efforts will one day be successful and you will be rewarded with a happy married life. Before we move on to how to keep your spouse happy, it is very necessary to understand the nature or built-in programming of both partners to tackle them accordingly.

Man’s nature

As far as relationship is concerned, it is in men’s instinct to dominate. God has put the

responsibility to feed their families and look after them. To do so, God has made them the head of the family. Likewise, any organization is led by a single boss; this world is governed by one God so a family can be headed by one person. Any organization that is led by two people can not be successful but it will often happen that both of them will disagree at many stages resulting in a catastrophe. Moreover, men do not like to work at home because they have been designed to work outside the house. Men always admire and love a woman who obeys them. To keep a man happy, the first and the foremost quality that a woman should posses is obedience. That does not mean that the wife will live like slaves. She can talk to her husband politely where she disagrees and can give her suggestions but once a man has taken a decision, she should accept it as long as it is not against the orders of God. By nature, men are not expressive and they always try to pose they are fine even if they are not.

Woman’s nature

Women are delicate by nature and are designed by God to look after their house and the

children. God has not put the responsibility of earning on women because many times it happens that women undergo some particular physical conditions like periods, pregnancy in which she does not find her in a stable condition. They can willingly do job but it is not compulsory for them to earn. As they had to look after house, children and their husband so doing job is an additional work over them. Women are emotional because they had to take care of children and husband. Only an emotional person can look after the little things you need to take care of your baby unlike men. Because of this emotional aspect, women have been given the beautiful responsibility to take care of the kids who require extreme attention and care. Men can not handle children like women can. Women are physically weak and they always need the support and protection of a man. Women need attention everyday. It is their nature to speak out what they feel. Men normally do not talk much but to keep your wife happy, you must give her a quality time everyday. If you do not talk to her, she’ll find someone else to speak out her feelings like friend or family. Women love to be praised and expressed so men should speak out what they like in the wives.

Though the aspects given in men and women’s nature are much against the concept of modern woman, but this is the way things are designed by God. You may make a person do what is not in his/her nature but this will not result in a satisfactory relationship as you can not change the nature of the person.

Fear of God

Marriage is a relationship designed by God and before entering into it, both spouses should consider the rights of each other that God has set. Being humans, they should respect each other and try not to do things that would disturb or hurt your spouse because in the here after, you will be questioned for each and every bad act you did with anyone intentionally. Accepting men as the head of the family does not mean women are inferior. Men are superior in their role of responsibilities. They’ll be questioned about their family and women will be questioned about their children and house. How did they look after them? Near God, pious person will be superior no matter a man or a woman. We should be good with our spouses for God’s sake because we’ll be careful about giving them their rights regardless of their attitude. A day will come they will realize their responsibilities. All humans make mistake. With forgiveness and patience, we should solve problems. As humans are imperfect and they always make mistakes. They can not make God happy who has given them so many blessings so how can they make you 100% happy.

Ways to save your marriage

#1

Communication is the first and the foremost tool in a successful marriage. Both partners should share everyday experiences with each other and give quality time of minimum one hour to each other. Many relationships are killed by the silence between the partners that emerge by not giving attention to their spouses and with the passage of time, they do not have anything to talk about.

#2

While giving quality time, make sure to remove anything in surroundings that is diverting your attention e.g TV, internet, telephone. Listen to each other carefully

#3

Both partners should care for each other ranging from large matters to small ones because if something is little for you and disturbing your spouse, soon it will emerge as a big problem.

#4

Express your feelings often and let the other partner know how important he/she is for you. Women are often expressive but men take things many things for granted after marriage. If you want to keep your wife happy, you should admire her; express your feelings for her everyday otherwise she will wither like a flower.

#5

Wife should obey her husband as far as it is not against the orders of God because the first thing men want in their relationship is the obedience of their wives.

#6

Both husband and wife should take care of each other relatives and friends.

#7

Both partners should admit the faults of their relatives and should not favor them unjustly.

#8

Women feel themselves secure if their husband listens to their problems. If your wife is telling you some problem, you should not ignore her otherwise she will feel lonely and you should tackle it justly even if it is your mistake or your relative’s. Never feel ashamed in accepting your mistake. Otherwise, it will result in increasing hatred in your wife’s heart as you are not acting justly.

#9

Give surprises to each other e.g leaving a romantic note while leaving for the other partner, giving gifts, flowers or making a good dish.

#10

If you have any problem, talk to each other politely. Politeness works best as far as problem solving is concerned.

#11

Never feel ashamed in admitting your fault. It solves the matter sooner.

#12

Every human has positive and negative points. Always keep an eye on the positive ones and ignore the negatives.

#13

Do not take a moment to forgive your partner. Always remember every relationship needs forgiveness to carry on otherwise it can not carry on.

#14

Never take your partner for granted. It’s human nature to take things for granted that come in our possession but your partner is a human not a thing. Always treasure his/her presence and your love should increase rather than decreasing with the passage of time.

#15

Help each other in every matter.

#16

If your spouse is feeling not well, leave everything and take care of him as he needs you the most at that time.

#17

Respect each other’s feelings and never make fun.

#18

Give unconditional love to each other. Give what you want from the other person. Soon you’ll have it.

#19

Remember each others birthdays and anniversaries.

#20

Respect each other specially in front of other people. If you disagree with your partner in a gathering, never point out in front of everyone. Discuss it later privately.

#21

Keep each others secrets. It will develop trust and do not talk negatively about your spouse with anyone else.

#22

Never support each others in bad acts.

#23

If you’ll be late from office, inform your spouse.

#24

If you are out of city for a day or more, give a phone call.

#25

Do activities together like playing a game, walking or cleaning house together.

#26

Always share light jokes with each other and keep alive a good sense of humor. Making someone smile is the best charity.

#27

Always remember the promises you make to each other and try to keep them.

#28

Help each other in cleaning your house.

#29

Always speak truth to each other. Lies can never save your relationship no matter how easy they seem.

#30

Never keep a physical relation without love like animals. It will make your relationship more worse than before.

Your world is full of responsibilities and commitments that you have to carry on everyday. Loads of challenges you face everyday. Sometimes, you are able to achieve those and sometimes you lose. Your mind controls your body and these everyday burdens are continuously revolving in it. Consequently, you have the feeling of having a stressed and tired mind which hinders you from performing routine activities comfortably.

Your brain also needs your attention and care to work smoothly. In order to take ourselves out of this stress and tension, we need to move through few simple steps that can make our mind and soul relaxed in a couple of minutes. These five easy-to-follow steps are listed below

1. Strengthen your Connection with God

Just like we feed food to our body, our soul needs its food too and that comes with a strong

relationship with God. It relaxes our mind, body and soul. The more we pray, the more it strengthens our faith. We do believe that our part is to work hard, try and pray and God will solve our problems. This blind trust provides us a power that people with less faith do not possess. Consequently, people with strong belief on God are less prone to stress and anxiety. As “Try Try Again” is the rule of the world and in one of the Holy books God says “I am according to the belief of the person”. If he is in firm in this belief, God will help him for sure. Another tip is to take sometime each day and talk to God about all of problems, fears and ask him to help you. This way you feel that he is listening to you and it relaxes your soul and body too.

All of the Holy books and scriptures give us a lesson that whatever difficulties that a man faces are all from God’s side. He has created this world to take the test of man’s faith. The test is going on everyday in the form of good and bad things that we are facing. By putting a human into difficulty, God checks whether this person has still strong faith over me and seeks help from me. Those who are ungrateful to God through thick and thin, they are unable to clear this test and will be sent to hell. The ones who are still seeking help from God and they do trust that God will take them out of this trouble, they will be rewarded with heaven after death. This trust has no benefit to God but it basically helps the man not losing hope in trouble. So it’s all about your advantage.

2. Take a nap 

Taking proper sleep at night stabilizes your mind and body to perform at their best. Minimum sleep of 8 hours is enough to give you a fresh start in the morning. All of you must have heard the proverb

“Early to Bed and Early to rise, make a man healthy, wealthy and wise”

Not a big deal !!

When you feel too much occupied, take a nap for sometime. Sleep not only charges your body to regain energy but relaxes your mind too. It has been proven also that taking a nap charges your mind and body to complete your tasks very quickly. A tired and restless mind is just like a computer with slow processor that has a slow pace to finish his jobs and nobody wants to keep. 

3. Fresh air Exercise

Our routine activities have kept us so busy that today we are moving away from the natural lifestyle. Most of the times, we sit in offices or take rest at home but have no time for

exercise. Exercise not only controls weight but it also improves mood, boosts energy and combats health conditions and diseases.

Minimum 30 minutes daily exercise plays a vital role in relaxing our mind and body. Outdoor exercise is more beneficial than the indoor one but going out is not possible then shift to an indoor option. Exercise is not only necessary for fat persons but also for the lean ones. No matter you are fat or not, but you all have a mind that needs to be relaxed. J Following are the few exercises that lift up your mind in no time.

      a. 30 minutes walk

      b. Yoga

      c. Aerobics

      d. Breathing exercises

      e. Outdoor games like badminton, cricket, baseball or any other.

4. Tackle Negative Thoughts and Distract them 

Sometimes it is very important to distract your mind from where it is stuck currently.

Because we often find negative thoughts revolving in our mind regarding the people or situations we face everyday. Negative thinking can harm our lives on large scale and a vital cause of many physical diseases specifically heart diseases. Every time, a negative thought arrives, recognize it and throw it out of your mind. For some people, it is as simple but for others it becomes difficult at times. Best way to trash a negative thought is by keeping your mind busy in good and healthy activities. Some are listed below :-

      a. Sports 
      b. Hobbies 
      c. Reading/ Writing 
      d. call a friend who has good humour 
      e. help the needy 
      f. go to your pet and play 
      g. Start watching a good TV show

If they all don’t seem to work, then adopt  a “So what !! It is not a problem. I’ll tackle it.” You will notice the difference soon.

5. Forgive and Forget

How many times in a day it happens that we have to deal with those people who are

irritating everyone, being selfish and thinking and favoring their own selves. Forgiveness is a strong virtue that gives a way to free your self of the chronic anger that was generated by these self-centered people. Forgiveness is the most efficient and powerful exercise that I would like to recommend all of you. Although it apparently gives an idea that you’ve seen extra nice to those who hurt you like hell but on the long run, it benefits you more than the culprit. Psychology has proved that forgiveness says good-bye to your chronic anger and bitterness and is proved to be the best exercise for your own mental health. Following are the benefits of forgiving people

      a. Relaxes your own mind and body 
      b. Keeps your relationships good
      c. Increases tolerance 
      d. Negative thoughts departs

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you”.—Unknown